This post isn’t as harsh as its title suggests. I don’t mean, you must succeed at everything you lay your hands on, rather you should delete the words fail and failure from your vocabulary. Nothing positive surrounds the word failure, and we need to be kind to our minds and choose words carefully.
My thinking behind this post is the fact that I didn’t complete my A Post A Day In May challenge. Does it matter? No. Was someone holding a gun to my head making me post everyday? No. Am I a bad blogger? No. Are there more important things in life to be thinking about? YES! I enjoy blogging, but I cannot let it take over my life. I think it’s so important to have not just a work / life balance, but an online / real life balance too. I was also inspired by a post I read recently on The Gloss, about giving up dreams. I resonated so much with me, I already had this post in my drafts, but had to publish it straight away.
This notion of not saying ‘I’ve failed’ doesn’t just apply to my blog and online life, but to my life in general. My dream as a child was to be a dancer on the West End stage, but at 25, too many injuries put that plan to bed. The natural step was to adapt my dream and re-train and work towards being a sucessful TV actress. That didn’t work for various reasons and my career moved towards fitness, almost accidentally. My dream now is to open my own health and fitness centre / adult dance studio. Does changing my dreams mean that I failed in my original options? Absolutely not, although it’s something that played on my mind for a long time.
I spent my whole life training to be a dancer, so naturally I felt a void when I decided to leave the profession. Having then spent an extortionate amount of money (a bank loan) to re-train at drama school, I didn’t love that world as much as I’d hoped. In all honesty, my personality didn’t fit. In my personal (emphasis on personal) experience of the performing arts industry, to remain true to yourself you have to be exceptional, or, you can force a strong, pushy personality and be average to good. I was very good, but not exceptional, and didn’t want to ‘fake it to make it’. It took me so long to realise that actually, I most likely wouldn’t have been happy in what I thought was my ‘dream job’.
The notion of failure plagued me so much that I asked my parents if they were angry that I’d wasted all their money and time throughout my entire life, only to fail at becoming a dancer. Their answer (apart from ‘of course not’) was that without all the dance and drama school training, I’d be in a completely different place and wouldn’t have discovered my current career that I love so much. I’d never be planning on opening a studio of my own, and wouldn’t be so excited about starting my own business.
So the point of this rather long ramble is that if I look upon myself as a failure, I’ll never have the confidence to strike out on my own. Delete the word failure, fail, even give-up from you life now. Life takes different paths, plans change and I’m a fierce believer that everything happens for a reason. I am so excited for my future plans, possibly more excited than I ever was about being a performer, which is a strange feeling at times, but one I’m embracing and rolling with. Will it happen? Who knows, but I’m excited to see what does!